Man, why does it not get better? I think I've been a good guy, mostly. Given what I had and started with, I honestly think that I did OK overall. Kept my sanity and self control for the most part growing up in a caustic and adversarial adopted home. Went to college and by the Grace of God I did finish and graduated into a 20 year career in the Navy. Went through a marriage that should never have happened but was a good learning experience. Married again into a drama filled second marriage, but did get three beautiful children.
So, what the heck am I supposed to do now that I'm 62, nearly broke, alone "again, naturally" for the most part? What? Where am I going? I look ahead to what 5, 10 more years of struggle and fighting to make ends meet? Whom am I doing this for? I would really like to have some good reasons for continuing this fight, this endless string of dead ends and cliffs.
What do you need to be happy? What is the real meaning of life? Family? Friends? Country? Wealth? The big 5: Fame, Fortune, Power, Knowledge, Sex? WTF? Man there are so many reasons to call it quits, to say the hell with it. I am very tired of this shit.
How about you?
Asian and American
Japanese Stella near Jefferson and FDR Memorials
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